johnnie...

I was tryin to find meaning in life..was tryin to achieve somethin in the meantime doin nothin but dreamin about it..and this was my life..Little did i care about anyone else.I always thought of life as a variable quantity rangin from 70 yrs to 90 yrs..thot idd do a 100 if i were lucky..
Im sorry god..i really am .I really believe that u exist though life always seems to bring sad moments.Today u took one of my closest ..I will miss him..may b u did too,a lil more than im doin i guess,since theyv always told me that ur a generous person.Im sorry that i mistook life for a 3 hr movie.I m really sorry that i never had any regard for the pain it cud bring.I am feelin pain now,is it pain? i really dont know..How can u feel pain when ur reduced to total numbness..?.I dont know..I cant even see him from here.Havent seen john since my first year in college .never realised taht it was gonna b my last time then..I hope i ll see u bro,some time if im good enuf to be in heaven..I ll just pretend tat ur really busy,no time to meet up wit us..yea just tat ..and that i could meet u anytime from now..