Scary shit

Well the question is ..y am i writing this ?? well the answer is simple..i donot know..

Im at the brink of the very limit of human sanity.If i go further im just gonna be as sensible as i was on my first blog.Whats bothering me ,u might wonder..Is it the past memories ? the memories of a terribly maintained failed relationship ? Or is it the terrible memories of the present well maintained relationship?Or is the mess food (that always there man...still),Is it..well tats about it..Its frankly my project thats botherin me ath moment..Nothing else is supposed to deter me from this holy path that i have adopted for a few days more..No more cartoons,i keep tellin myself,giving my mind the space it needs to concentrate on the subject in hand..It is impossible ,just not realisable by a mentally challenged dimwit like u ,says my conscience..(what a conscience man..it makes me look bad of all the ppl,my conscience .),i try to repel it tellin myself that its only through sheer determination and guts that things as mentally challengong as this can be done.Not a nice thing to tell my conscience...now it knows that im a loser..